Sometimes life takes
a real turn for the worse when you're with the wrong person. You can become so
wrapped up in the other persons life that you don’t even notice how terribly
your own life is going down. Eventually you become so lost that it may mock a
depression. But in reality, you just met the wrong person. This is what
happened to me. I didn’t even realize how bad that person was for me. The big
break up went something like this "I met another woman and had drinks with
her and listened to music. I didn’t want to tell you because I felt bad. But I
don’t like you because you don’t like country music and I just want to listen
to country music. I met her on social media. So I don’t want to be with you
anymore, you need to leave." Imagine my surprise to hearing this. I
thought and said "Why didn’t you break up with me first before trying to
meet other people?" Typical response was a cold glare of hate. The next
day he packed a bag and is now staying with his new girlfriend and apparently
seems content. One weeks its "I cant imagine life without you." the
next its all history. So imagine if you can, what the middle of the
relationship was like with someone who didn’t truly have any emotions for me.
That’s right, it was lonely, confusing and empty.
It took a lot of
inner confidence to realize the value within myself. As a woman, I felt
humiliated and defeated. Fortunately over the course of the years I began to
form hobbies that kept me from losing touch with myself. I found peace in
certain aspects and chaos in others. After awhile I began to focus less on the
chaos and more on the peace. It brought me to a place where I felt at ease.
This was the place, that in the end, I knew I was suppose to be. A friend of
mine said "Life is to short to be wasting it on someone who doesn’t care
about you." I thought about that statement over and over. What I came up
with was this: Life isn't really that short. It only seems short when you're
not living in harmony with your thoughts and actions. Life would feel fulfilled
on a level of genuine peace, if you live your purpose. Then and only then
will the right people enter and that
genuine sense of fulfillment will guide you through. Its not exactly about the
right person completing you, its more about how you complete yourself to become
the right person you desire.
Upon getting
"right" within myself, which is always a work in progress I had to
realize my purpose. Essentially I think that the core of you are and have been
in your life since birth should prove what you're meant to become. The core of
who I always was had a lot to do with imagination, creativity and the outdoors.
Nature was always my main source of peace. . A mind cannot feel chaos in the
midst of the calming sense of nature. Its undeniable.
After the
forgiveness took hold, all the pain went away. I knew exactly what I needed to
do. I need to help others find peace through nature. Even if that peace is just
a mild walk through nature listening to the birds play and watching the flowers
bloom. Peace within soothes so much pain. I'm not mad about the last few years.
If anything it brought me back to myself and helped me realize who I truly was
and am. Its part of living your purpose. Sometimes confusion can set in and we
get off track but then nature calls and it becomes all good again.
Find peace in Porter
county with http://www.facebook.com/fitfortyoutdoors
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